About David Vass

About David Vass...


(Please note some of David’s colleagues, friends, family and his spouse choose not to be identified due to the subject matter in Verbal Voyeur.  Therefore, some of this bio is redacted at their request and it is also very trendy.)


David comes from a long line his mother once foolishly listened to.  

He works as the ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇, considered to be the highest rated luxury travel company in the world, and has visited 141 countries over the past 20 years, when he is not prancing around on ‘the boards’, reeking of greasepaint .  His partner of 40 years and spouse of 11  ▇▇▇▇, has threatened to leave any city when this show plays, and doesn’t ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ with Verbal Voyeur.  Go figure.

Many of David’s current friends and colleagues are most comfortable not being named in the production or thanked by name for their immeasurable help, support and feedback, due to fear or retribution by association (especially the strawberry story).

In the tradition of cringe memoirists like David Sedaris, Quintin Crisp, and Augusten Burroughs, Vass delivers a series of scenes that can shock, may embarrass, but will always entertain.  This web of stories is culled from real life - a very unusual life - and paint a picture of worldly places and events.

Production Notes from the Diarist:

The concept behind this one-man evening is ‘to come clean’ about the first half of my life.  

By coming clean I mean that when I went last year to detox and rehab I heard some of the most honest stories in a minimum amount of time from drug, alcohol and various other chemical users – everything from running over their children in an altered state to stealing money from friends and family to hiding bottles under plants so spouses would think they were gardening and such.  And it started me thinking, how honest, really honest, about every aspect of my life can I be?  I’m not talking about embellishing a story here or there, but brutal honesty – the good, the bad, the ugly.  I’m 70.  What am I waiting for -80?  Some say to forgive yourself is to begin genuinely loving yourself.  I’m about to find out.


Sometimes I feel my whole life has been a lie.  At one point I was a pathological liar.  It was one of my addictions and I came out the other side of it, often now being called out for 'brutal honesty'.  Here are some other addictions; you see I have been addicted to various things my entire life (i.e. a marathon of addictions).  What my psychiatrist, Dr ▇▇▇▇▇▇ ▇▇▇▇ tells me is that the way I stack these things up is indicative of an addictive personality:  refusing to talk for two years as a little boy,  stealing, sex, pot, cocaine, cigarettes, alcohol, Valium, Oxi,  Quaaludes, black beauties, my beloved partner in life ▇▇▇▇▇.  There always seems to be something that I like to be addicted to.  The point of this evening for me is to see if I can become addicted to the truth.

So this is me coming clean to you.  About everything.  Is it interesting?  I am told so at dinner parties where I am often completely inappropriate to the situation - some calling me a raconteur and others an asshole.  Can theatre be therapeutic both to the giver and the receiver?  I hope so or I am fucked. 

Maybe it’s only possible for me to be 100% honest after a pill and a drink.  Or maybe I will come to realize that the other end of this rabbit hole is to tell my stories not in any altered state, and only that way can a person be really honest.  So for now, I am going to be honest with my words and my body by telling you I am almost certain I will be in some kind of altered state for every performance.  I’m OK with owning that.  Is that honesty or am I being a coward?  

And yes, it is possible to be a verbal voyeur.  I love looking at words, as art.  All right then, here we go…